This is DNN!!!

Deities, welcome to the second show of the 2005 edition of WTPHSEOFOE. Today's guest is God, please applaud him!

[audience frantically applauds, a man in the shadows scribbles the name of those who haven't applauded on a book titled "purgatory accounting book"]

Welcome God.

Thanks, I wouldn't have missed this for all of Allah's Virgins.

Tell me, which country do you think will win this year's edition?

There is no telling, I know only one thing for sure, the chances of Turkey winning are statistically insignificant as to be quite laughable.

While we are on the subject, what do you think of Allah's complaints about the unfairness of Turkey being the sole Muslim nation on the board?

I do understand how he feels, but it really isn't my fault that the DHSA chose that section of the world for this year's game.

This would have nothing to do with you being the President of the DHSA those last few years, I suppose?

Nonsense! Besides I didn't choose to be President, it just happened to be my turn. I had no choice.

What do you think of Allah's special announcement on this show last week?

The 128 virgins deal?

Yes.

I think it's an unfair business practice and a violation of the Deity Fair Trade Act! I have lodged a complaint to the Deity Trade Organisation for unfair business practices and market dumping.

Does that mean that you won't reciprocate?

Indeed. But let it be known that I will be particularly forgiving when it'll come to the sins of the General which shall conquer Turkey.

[trumpets blaring]

Excuse me, God, but our studio in Geneva is announcing some developments. Hello, Geneva?

Yes, Ragotus, this is Geneva.

What have you got for us?

As you know in 1863 we created the Red Cross as a front for the WTPHSEOFOE to collect information and footage of all sides of the conflicts. Our informants have detected multiple troop movements all around Switzerland; France, Germany and Italy seem to be on the move! It has started!

Do you know where the troops are going?

Not yet, the reports are still fuzzy, we shall soon know more. But we can also report that Switzerland has just signed multiple armament contracts with most major European nations.

Isn't Switzerland supposed to be neutral?

Ragotus, please, remember, one is still neutral when one sells equal amounts of weapons to everyone!

Right, forgot about that subtle piece of "logic". Anyway, this is the end of today's show, thank you God for appearing here and see all of you next week for an update into the first troop movements and some strategical analysis.

[cues DNN jingle]


French Chasseurs Alpins hurrying into position spotted by WTPHSEOFOE agents under Red Cross cover.